Not satisfied with the public relations disaster that was #AustraliansForCoal, the Minerals Council yesterday launched a new campaign to plug their favourite little black rock. This time, they tried to convince us that #coalisamazing. It went just as badly.
The Minerals Council would have us believe that coal makes the world a better place. They reckon coal is as amazing as your best friend who always knows how to cheer you up, your cousin who helped you move houses that one time, or your mate who always buys the first round.
We weren’t so sure – until today, when a lovely little piece coal helped everyone in the office out. Coal was so great at…
Keeping us caffeinated
WOW! #coalisamazing – just made me a lovely cuppa tea #thankscoal pic.twitter.com/zGor6kZTHa
— Jamie Ling (@jamie_ling) September 7, 2015
Keeping us beautiful
Coal is good for the pore, who knew… #excoaliate #coalisamazing pic.twitter.com/vHZm12UoQX — Ben (@bensolity) September 7, 2015
Taking care of food scraps
Coal took the compost bin out today. Thanks coal, you’re amazing! #coalisamazing pic.twitter.com/c2y29AO5NV
— Jacki Boyce (@jackisea) September 7, 2015
Keeping us happy
Coal always knows how to pick me up after a hard day’s work #coalisamazing #whenbaeiscoal pic.twitter.com/CmCa2EOtrs — Kristian Barron (@kj_barron) September 7, 2015
Coal inspired us…
Thanks @rashini_s for my present. It makes a great addition to my inspiration wall. #coalisamazing #coalspiration pic.twitter.com/14uu6Ldq0c — shelley waldock (@shelleywaldock) September 7, 2015
Coal knew just how to help
#coalisamazing I don’t need to speak for myself, i just let coal do the talking #blacklungdisease pic.twitter.com/BWQ7dVMQCU
— @rb_manch September 7, 2015
Coal held us down
Coal is as good a paper weight as any other rock. #CoalisAmazing pic.twitter.com/FKTg0nwhrt — Patrick Conan Keane (@pckeane2014) September 7, 2015
Coal made everyone else jealous
#coalisamazing look how jealous all the other rocks are pic.twitter.com/jzcYQMZKWB
— Polly Kornie (@KornieP) September 7, 2015
Wasn’t too proud to do chores
When coal does your photocopying for you… Thanks coal. #coalisamazing pic.twitter.com/yYCCjCUIeV — Ariana (@Ariana_Neu) September 7, 2015
Plus, coal is so smart!
My m8 coal. So well read! #coalisamazing pic.twitter.com/ZH5hDfAioU
— Kristian Barron (@kj_barron) September 7, 2015
It can do tough jobs
So helpful thanks coal! This cute little lump just helped Stephen fudge the numbers for his report. #coalisamazing pic.twitter.com/wMj375COYJ — shelley waldock (@shelleywaldock) September 7, 2015
Has great music taste
Thanks to coal for helping choose our music this afternoon! #coalisamazing pic.twitter.com/MACWb5og1J
— Liesha Hanekroot (@lieshahk) September 7, 2015
Which isn’t surprising, because…
Not just amazing, but so coaltured! #coalisamazing pic.twitter.com/bgULf4V5c4 — Jess Panegyres (@Jess_Panegyres) September 7, 2015
Coal even helped me write this!
What a legend! This little black rock is helping me write a blog about coal today. Another reason why #coalisamazing pic.twitter.com/Cv0I5MEKOz
— Rashini ? (@rashini_s) September 7, 2015
It’s a shame that our mate coal contributes to air pollution and thousands of premature deaths. It’s also a real bummer that coal is the number one cause of climate change – which could increase the frequency and severity of natural disasters, cause ocean acidification and desertification, and inundate island nations.
Coal IS amazing at one thing – sequestering carbon. That’s exactly why we need to keep this little black rock firmly in the ground. Agree? Join a movement of passionate Aussies helping to stop our dependence on dirty fossil fuels and move towards a brighter, cleaner, renewable future instead.
